Another Nightmare

[Ariel Evans]

Ariel Evans had now been in St. Mungos hospital for quite awhile, on what was basically the long-term psychiatric ward generally reserved for those who had endured severe damage from unliftable curses. Well, Ariel didn't want to believe that all she'd been through would cause her permanent psychological damage. She could accept that her ancestor had inflicted her with some very nasty curses, particularly the one that he used to drain so much of her energy throughout most of her sixth year at Hogwarts. What if it did leave her permanently depressed and with little energy? The physical scars from the horrendous day that had brought her and Matt here...the stab wound scars from that horrendous battle in the Room of Requirement after learning that Slytherin had murdered her parents, and the later slash scars on her wrists that had prompted her hospitalization...Ariel could live with. It was the psychological aftereffects that she didn't want to live with.

Yes, her appetite had slowly returned, and there were rare moments when she almost felt her normal self (usually with Matt). But her mood really hadn't lifted all that much. Oh, she'd sometimes feel all right for awhile. Key words being for awhile. And then horrible flashbacks to the day she lost her parents, or something else would bring up a surge of grief that went beyond what was actually happening at the moment. Ariel had usually tried to hide it so Matt didn't have to see her like this. Now, she just gave in and went somewhere to be on her own for a little bit until she felt calmer again. Oh, she didn't want to live like this! She wanted desperately to return to her cousins, where her sister Issie was living, so that she'd at least have a bit of summer left with them before her seventh year started. She wanted to be normal, with her life safe and peaceful again. She wanted some semblance of emotional stability and normalcy.

Her life had already become unrecognizable from the happy, safe, peaceful life she'd had. Were she to meet herself of a year ago, that girl wouldn't recognize the Ariel she was now. And she would never return to normal again. But even being able to function in school again for her seventh year at Hogwarts...that was her goal.

Seventh year. That in and of itself was another major worry for Ariel. What if she didn't make it out of here before September first? The last thing Ariel wanted was for her education to be disrupted. But no matter how hard she worked at getting better, Ariel still needed naps throughout the day, or she'd be our for two days straight. She and Matt had definitely had some fun adventures in what had come to be their favorite room on the ward, but whenever Ariel pushed herself to her physical limits (with the help of an energizing potion), she far too easily felt drained afterwards. And that simply wasn't getting better. At least, not better enough for her liking.

In fact, Ariel had been asleep, resting after dinner. It had been hours later into the evening that she awoke finally, still very tired. Apparantly, she'd had another one of those nightmares, for she awoke to find herself in restraints. She scarcely had a voice left, ostensibly from screaming earlier, and she felt quite drugged. Someone must have given her a dreamless sleep draught. With what little voice she had left, she called out to someone to release her from her bindings, fighting down her terror at the reminder of one of her traumatic memories. It vividly reminded Ariel of the ropes that had once bound her before Matt's sometimes homicidal split personality Christian had stabbed her for the first time during that battle in the Room of Requirement.

With wide emerald eyes, she fixed her gaze on the door, hoping someone soon would get her out of these restraints now that she was all right. Her forehead was slightly damp, and her long ebony curls spilled around her on the bed as she fought to release her restraints while she waited. Oh, what she wouldn't give to be out of this white gown she had to wear and in her normal clothes, far away from here in her cousins' familiar, cozy home!

[Aimee Kensington]

Am typing a post.
-Grin-

[Aimee Kensington]

When you chose to work in a hospital, you chose to work with tragedy, hold hands with death and fight when there is no fight left. It was exhausting. But when you chose to work on the Spell Damage floor you chose to do all that, notice no improvement and pursue regardless. Improvement was rare in Aimee’s patients, large improvements rarer still. The majority of her patients never left, living out their days isolated from the world, in closed rooms, closed wards, their trail of family that had once filled a room, dwindling each visit. Why bother, they said. They don’t know me; they don’t know when I’m not there. It infuriated Aimee that they could leave the lonesome to their own devices. There was no way they could pull through if their family didn’t believe. Yes, Aimee had seen her share of tragedy, had fought to keep a strong face as her patients blinked at her, so forgotten, so unknown. Reading their clipboards became more and more difficult. You didn’t get put in a hospital permanently for nothing.

The stories she had stumbled across were terrible. The type of thing you couldn’t think up just because it seemed like it would never happen, absurdity that the world could be so harsh, so cruel. And that individuals had to take the strain of the load, a burden strapped to their back. There were stories that tormented you soul even from reading of their records, stories that you had to muster everything to become unfeeling just so they wouldn’t see you break down. Being a Healer meant being strong, for yourself and all your patients. It meant being relied on, saving the world and fighting fights for someone else. And of all the horror stories that plagued the fourth floor and spread throughout the remainder of St Mungo’s like the viruses they were treating, Ariel Evans was pretty high up.

At sixteen she had suffered the way Aimee could not compare. Both her parents were dead and there were dark secrets lurking behind her eyes. Other Healers had claimed her mad, hearing the occasional word that slipped past sleeping lips. But Aimee knew that with her sleep came vulnerability, and it was then that the torments of her past provoked. Ariel was not insane; she was not suicidal either. You had to speak to the girl only to realise that but not being in a position to do more than suggest, the girl still remained in the hands of St Mungo’s.

Aimee was doing the final rounds for her evening. She’d meant to have left two hours earlier but she figured there wouldn’t be any dinner cooked at home now anyway so why not be useful? And as long as she kept out of sight, they’d never be the wiser.

It was then as she walked down the main corridor of Spell Damage, floor four, that she heard a voice call out. Stopping in her step, forehead creasing looked towards the door on her right. Pressing her check against the tiny viewing window she pushed back brown hair, frizzy at the end of a dying day, and peered inside. It was Ariel Evans’ room.

Aimee pushed the door open; the dimming lights from the corridor illuminating the corner of the room, a glimmer fell across the girl’s face. It was then she saw the restraints and the flailing girl tugging upon them. Putting her clipboard down on the small table by the door Aimee picked up the one from the end of her bed. She knew the majority of what was written but what she really wanted to know was: why in gods names was the kill tied down like any common animal? She’d been given a dreamless sleep draught, authorised by Dr Peters. She’d also been having one of those nightmares and it would appear that her screams had alarmed the patients within the near perimeter. Aimee shook back her hair once more and rose her eyes from the clipboard. Moving towards the girl she gently pushed her body back down onto the bed, trying to limit the fight the girl had within her.

“Please don’t struggle Ariel, it’s not good to get yourself stressed.”

She remained standing by the side of the bed. There had to be a reason for the restraints, one that wasn’t documented on her file so by all rights to the law and her own protection, she shouldn’t touch them but was it morally right to tie a person down against their will?

It wasn’t an easy situation.

[Ariel Evans]

Dreamless sleep potions had never seemed to work for Ariel, at least, if this past school year was anything to go by. And by now whatever limited effectiveness they might once have had was gone. She'd tried it several times in desperation to try to stop the nightmares, but of course it made sense that the potion hadn't worked then. After all, those nightmares hadn't been normal; he had invaded her dreams. Yes, her ancestor had been very real, a fragment of soul trapped in a horcrux he'd once made (the locket passed down through the generations to her). And Ariel was convinced that it was whatever he'd done to try to drain her energy that had left her like this, with wildly fluctuating energy levels and corresponding changes in mood. There were times she felt strong and even a bit cheerful, and unexpectedly her energy could suddenly drain away to the point that she felt emotional and exhausted. However her ancestor had drained her energy enough to come back without actually killing her had to have been different from the way Tom had attempted with Ginny, for Ginny certainly hadn't had these effects. Anyway, add this to the normal post-traumatic stress and grief over losing her parents, and things were a bit of a mess these days!

Ariel still had yet to really explain about this situation here at St. Mungo's. After all, it was something so very unusual, and how could she begin to explain it all without getting into the spell she called the 'reincarnation awakening,' that had taken effect at Hogwarts this year and caused some people to begin remembering past lives from several centuries before? This had brought to light not only her bloodlines but a past life connection with her ancestor that had led to all that had happened. But it all would sound crazy to anyone else who hadn't been through it. Only Matt and Christian could even verify her ancestor's existence and the existence of that spell, because they'd been there for the whole thing. Matt had even, unfortunately, encountered her ancestor once before, about a month prior to the battle. So the closest she'd gotten to talking about what she'd been through was to explain that the person responsible for the murder of her parents had also attacked her and her best friend Matt in the Room of Requirement shortly after she'd received word from her cousins about what had happened to her parents. She had, of course, not said anything at all about how her ancestor had exploited the spells she and Matt had found related to multiple personalities. He'd used the spell to initiate a personality switch, turning Matt into his sometimes homicidal split personaliity, Christian (a basically ok guy who was a bit full of himself and didn't hesitate to ask people anything that he was curious about), and had ensured that Christian would be in a homicidal mood that day. This was something Ariel didn't want anyone else here to know about, for Matt's sake. And for Christian's as well; after all, he was a good friend, too, regardless of what had happened. Ariel wouldn't deny that she was still a bit angry that Christian had taken his side instead of hers. But she'd forgiven him for that, and the two of them had often had a good time playing little Jason's video game in the hospital's Room of Requirement. Yes, Matt and Christian had another personality, a friendly, amazingly imaginative five-year-old named Jason, who'd created an intricate video game with a spy theme. Once Christian had gotten over his intial anger at finding himself unexpectedly here with no prior warning that day they'd arrived, he hadn't been in a homicidal mood again, thankfully. The only problem was, little Jason found out about Christian's homicidal side through experiencing it firsthand the night they'd arrived after Matt's initial medication had broken down the barriers among the personalities.

They'd all been so very lucky to have survived that horrendous day and night. Sadly, the next day, she'd had to explain about the multiple personalities to Jason after he'd asked how Matt and Christian were also there with them at St. Mungo's. Until then, Jason only knew of Matt and Christian's existence as friends of Ariel's whom he'd met one day in the Room of Requirement when she and Matt requested for all three personalities to meet face to face after Christian finally discovered that he had multiple personalities. Ariel would never forget the gales of laughter that had first greeted her explanation after he'd found Matt's name in his textbook until Matt had managed to communicate with him and tell him that Ariel wasn't joking.


When Ariel had first arrived here at St. Mungo's, she'd been even more afraid of being in these restraints. After all, if Christian decided to be in a homicidal mood again, how perfect would it be for him to find her like this? She'd been very lucky that first night of their arrival that Christian had changed his mind (thanks to Matt being partially dominant and able to sway Christian's thoughts) about taking his anger out on her when she wasn't in any physical shape to fight back. Not to mention, Ariel wouldn't want Matt to see her this way, or for little Jason to be even more scared about being in here by finding her tied up like this. Now that Matt had been discharged, she still had to battle the reminders of being tied up helplessly, not to mention the worry about what any of the other patients might do. Some of them were a bit violent.

Of course, Ariel wasn't quite fully aware of the secrets she let slip while trapped within her nightmare, or the need to keep her bound so that she couldn't do damage to herself, others, and property while lashing out self-protectively in those nightmares.

To Ariel's profound relief, she caught a glimpse of someone peeking into her room through the small window. Right away, she stopped her struggles now that she was hopefully about to be let out of these restraints. As the healer entered her room, she was thankful that the healer was female rather than male. This made Ariel much more comfortable as long as she didn't attempt any form of Legilimency or empathic connection the way that Healer Rasmussion in the Hospital Wing at Hogwarts that night had done...it had reminded Ariel far too much of what he, her ancestor would do.

Trying to sit up as best she could as she waited patiently, if still somewhat nervously, to be let out of these restraints, Ariel granted enough trust in this healer to allow herself to be pushed gently back onto the bed. It was then she began to be aware of how tender her wrists and ankles had become from being rubbed by the restraints during her earlier struggles.

With a nod of confirmation that she understood, Ariel replied, "All right. Must have had some dream, though, but I'm fine now that I'm awake. Could I please get out of these restraints now?"

Her expression hopeful, Ariel awaited the healer's decision. She had no idea that the reason for the restraints wasn't documented in her chart or that she might have to consult whoever had ordered this precaution before letting her out. It was such a commonplace precaution that Ariel was getting used to it as she awoke and figured that all the healers by now pretty much knew why it was needed sometimes. But she just wanted out now that the nightmare was over. The last thing that Ariel wanted was to be stuck here for the rest of the night, with no chance to be up and around and away from all of this before bedtime.

[Aimee Kensington]

Tobias Letchford had been the Healer to first show Aimee the ropes as a trainee. He’d been the guy everyone was scared of, the old guy with a gruff voice and a glare that made you want to turn in the other direction, and that had been exactly what Aimee had attempted on her first day under his supervision. In a typical Aimee fashion, she was late. And late, it appeared, was her first mistake of the morning, but not her last.

“Kensington, dying patients do not wait for you to get your ass through those doors. And neither do I.”

It was Tobias that had taught her the procedures; the right from wrong, how to handle yourself in an emergency and how to use that Muggle contraption called an ‘alarm clock.’ It was Tobias who had poured all his knowledge into that thick-skinned brunette. Medicine was a competitive field to be in, Muggle or magic dimension. He found pride in his student, in her improvements, her attitude, her abilities, her obvious talent but he looked down on the sensitivity she had for patients. In a hospital, where people were brought to be saved but couldn’t always, it wasn’t a good idea to get attached. To tie yourself to the recovery of a patient, to pour yourself into them until you could feel your heart beating with theirs. Aimee cared too much he said and throughout all her training he had tried to break that but destroying that part of her was like destroying spirit and in the end he simply couldn’t do it. In the end Tobias Letchford had admitted to his first defeat.

Aimee was a trusting person, a flaw he had seen from the first day that she had entered St Mungo’s. She wasn’t an idiot but something they called a heart told her that in everyone was someone worth while, that no person could be rotten to the core, that everyone was worth a chance. She had honestly believed that and it had taken a long time for her to side with her head over her heart.

Aimee was no longer that trusting person.

But this was different, she knew Ariel, somewhat briefly, she knew her story, she had treated her before and she had watched Dr Peters treat her. She knew that these restraints weren’t for protecting the staff or other patients from Ariel but rather protecting Ariel fro herself. She knew they were for her nightmares, the ones that sent her tossing, the ones that tormented her mind. Ariel was awake now and regardless of the note that hadn’t been added to her file, Aimee knew she wasn’t in any particular danger.

The girl was sixteen for gods sakes. Sixteen was a powerless age.

The year Aimee turned nineteen Lisa had been sixteen. It was that year that grey emerged into her world, before everything had been black or white, good or bad. Curled together in her younger sisters bed, her body pressed close to hers, touching, breathing together, for her, Lisa had told Aimee of rough hands, grabbing hands, wandering, powerful, familiar hands. Aimee’s arms holding her close, pushing her hair from her cheek, her neck she had spilled the secrets that had lodged themselves in the back of her throat for a year. The secrets that had left her ruined for any other, the secret that he had whispered into her ear, keep it to yourself, a pact between family members, between uncle and niece. To Aimee her sister was a wonder, a light but to Lisa, she was nothing more than ruined, wasted, rotting.

Don’t ever tell me my world is anything than amazing.

Aimee looked to the younger girl and hovered between procedure and her heart. She'd never been good at making choices but now was not the time to allow herself to wander on the line on indecisive. In the end she decided to release the girl, after all if it wasn’t documented on her file, no one would be the wiser. Pulling her wand from the inside of her robes Aimee waved it and the restraints disappeared.

“Must have been one hell of a dream.”

Aimee pocketed her wand once more and snatched the file from the end of the girls bed once more, making a note at the bottom of the page.

Don’t be lazy, fill in ALL medical information, this includes potions, draughts, Muggle medicines, restraints and appropriate reasons, behaviours and side affects. –Kensington.

[Ariel Evans]

Powerless.

Yes, Ariel had definitely been powerless in many ways lately. She hadn't been able to prevent him from killing her parents. She hadn't managed to find a way to stop him permanently until it was too late. Oh, if only they'd had the conversation that had resolved things two days sooner, her mom and dad would still be alive! She hadn't been able to fight off his influence during the battle long enough to stop the stabbing or what he'd done to her after taking her away from Christian and Matt (well, his past self Marshall at the time) to a remote corner of the room...

She had told only two people about what happened there. Only her dear friend Evan knew, as did the healer in the Hospital wing who'd treated Ariel while the people from St. Mungos were on their way for her. It wasn't something she'd talked about with Matt or Christian, though for all Ariel knew they might have guessed what went on before Slytherin had brought her back to them for the final confrontation. After all, she'd been brought back in some sort of dress rather than the jeans and cami she'd been wearing during the battle.

Ariel hated the feeling of powerlessness! If it hadn't been for her family and friends, as well as the fact that she had managed to end the battle with help from Marshall and Christian, and the fact that she'd thrown off his influence enough later that night to get out of the trunk to get help after he'd made her slash her wrists during another nightmare, Ariel didn't know how she would have gotten through it all.

Though it was beyond difficult to endure being tied up helplessly in these restraints, she managed to do so, and thankfully Healer Kensington released her bonds. With a smile of relief and gratitude, Ariel slowly sat up, gently rubbing her sore wrists before reaching up a slender hand to smooth her curls.

"Thank you," she replied in a voice barely above a whisper. At the comment on her dream, Ariel nodded. "Yeah, it was..."

It had been filled with a nightmarish jumble of images, some of which were her imaginings of the attack that had destroyed her parents and her childhood home, some of which were from the battle, and others from the nightmare in the Chamber where he'd threatened her little sister Issie's life and caused Ariel to harm herself after she lost it completely and attacked him viciously for it.

She'd been told that it was typical to have nightmares after going through a trauma, and though she had no idea just how mental most of the healers suspected her of being, she followed their advice of talking about it in group and individtual sessions. AFter all, it was supposed to be quite important to deal with it all, particularly since she was taking dreamless sleep droughts on occasion in efforts to prevent the nightmares. Things would only get worse if she pushed it all away and avoided dealing with all that happened.

But for now, avoiding it until bedtime was just what Ariel wanted to do. Now that she was out of her restraints, she just wanted a little bit of normalcy...at least, as normal as one could actually get in a hospital like this. She just wanted to dress in regular clothes and do something....like watch Muggle television, or read a good book, or write in her journal, or maybe even talk with someone, until bedtime.

This was actually a major step for Ariel, who had lost a lot of her energy and interest in such things once Matt had left and she didn't have to pretend so much that she was all right. She'd sort of let down then for a time, partly because she couldn't keep up pretenses any longer and partly because she really missed her best friend. It was so much harder to be here now, away from those she was closest to. But after her healers had helped her through this initial 'slump', Ariel had fought harder than ever to start truly getting better so that she could get out of here and back to her family, especially in time to return to Hogwarts in the fall. Unfortunately, things were progressing agonizingly slowly, but she'd learned to take things a day at a time.

She'd get there. She had to.

[Ariel Evans]

Bump?